Baby Anderson: The Journey

On October 5, 2006, God gave us the biggest blessing we could imagine: our daughter Liliana. So here is a place for our friends and family to keep up with her as she grows.

Monday, April 28, 2008

Moving On...

I had the best intentions of posting long before this, but have put it off because I wasn’t sure what exactly to post. I will start by sharing a few thoughts on my grandfather, and then provide some updates on the Anderson Clan.

Grandpa:

On April 5, we buried my Grandfather, Clyde Chynoweth, in a flood of tears and sadness. The funeral was very nice and I was happy that our family at Saint Nicholas was so eager and kind as to help us through a very difficult time.

I wish I could say that the rest of the weekend, with the gathering of family was a special time, but it wasn’t. It was a time filled with high emotions, stress, and lots of grief. Everyone grieves in their own way and sometimes that’s not exactly sensitive to the way other people might grieve. What I experienced that weekend was a family unsure of how to move forward without the thread that had held us all together. I don’t really have much more to say about that.

Staylee and I are both people who grieve quietly. I think because of the stress of that weekend and the days leading up to it, neither of us got to truly work through our feelings. We thought we had worked through it, but then we have days when something sneaks up to us. We were leaving a restaurant after dinner the other night and Staylee abruptly went back inside. He came out looking shaken. He told me later he had gone back to wait for Grandpa, something he always did to help him to the car. I was cleaning our house the other day and found a Valentine Grandpa sent me last year—he sent me one from him and another one addressed “to Mommy, love Liliana.” I was cleaning out the freezer yesterday and came across some turkey cutlets he had picked out for me to cook for him.

It’s weird, I guess, in that his loss was not sudden. It was expected and, as I tell everyone who checks on me, a blessing that he did not suffer any longer. He had a great life. I suppose I am just surprised with how much he was a part of our everyday lives. The best part of his funeral weekend was spending an afternoon with my cousins in his house. It was amazing because we all had different memories. It was also interesting because my experience of the house was so different. Staylee and I walked in after my cousins had been there a bit and heard them discussing how organized he was—with everything labeled on his label-maker. I can’t say it was something I had forgotten; rather it was something I just took for granted, as much a part of him as his tin mug and its place in the drain rack. I needed that afternoon because it reminded me of how extraordinary all the little things that I just accepted as part of him really were.

I miss him. Staylee and I both do. We haven’t been back to his house; it’s too hard right now. We have discussed the possibility of trying to buy the house from my uncles later on, but both feel we need a few months to work through our grief before we can make that decision, one way or another.

I thankful for so many things about him: I am thankful that he got to spend as much time with Lili as he did. I’m thankful that I got to experience China with him, a trip that he so wanted to make. I thankful for all the quiet moments we shared. And most of all, I am very thankful to have been a part of his life and to been given the gift of being raised by such an incredible man. He was the only father I have ever known.

The night before his stroke, Grandpa, Lili, and I went to dinner at a new place here in Midland. We had a pretty long wait for food, but he didn’t complain, just enjoyed playing with Lili. We both had the Hawaiian, me the burger, him the chicken sandwich. When we dropped him off, he thanked me for driving, as he always did. And then he said, “Love you, babies.” We love you, too, Grandpa.

Updates:

Liliana is 18 (now almost 19) months old. She went for her check up and she weighs 22 pounds and is 31 inches tall, so she is rather on the small size. Dr. Reese says she’s advanced in her motor skills, although her speech is a little late. She’s not worried about it and thinks it will improve when she goes to Mother’s Day Out this summer. She still loves everything to do with Mickey and Minnie Mouse, Cinderella, and 101 Dalmatians. Her new love is being outside. I’ll post some pictures of that when I get up the April pictures in the next few days. We actually have to drag her back inside, usually screaming. She’s very affectionate and loves to give hugs and pats. We’re working on eating with a spoon and drinking out of straw, but she’s still a bit shaky. She’s really into shapes and things she can pull apart. We’re working on her patience by reading a story every night before prayers. Although sometimes I have to physically contain her; it’s going better than I had anticipated.

Staylee just got back from a weekend trip of visiting his grandfather, dad, and stepmother. He is finishing up his semester with strait As. His best friend Michael has been discharged from the Army and moved back to Midland. We’re looking forward to spending more time with him and he’s looking forward to getting to know his goddaughter, Lili, better. Staylee has been working long hours, but his company at least recognizes his hard work and has given him a really nice raise in the past few weeks.

And myself? I’m sort of in stasis right. My job search continues and I do have some promising prospects. My thesis appears to be on the verge of being finished—my introduction has been approved and they are talking about formatting, which I take as indication that we’re nearing the end. I’m still waiting for requested revisions on the creative portion of it, but the initial reaction that they really liked it.

Coming Up:
In two weeks Mom and I are going to Orlando with Lili to unwind for a few days. In June Lili starts Mother’s Day Out two days a week. We are hoping it will improve her verbal and social skills. Staylee is going to continue taking classes and I’m going to continue my job search and hopefully defend my thesis in June. We are also hoping to spend more time together in the coming months.

We have been discussing our plans for the next five years, whether they will take us to another city, whether they will keep us here, whether they will include another child, how school and work and Lili's education fits into all of it. No major decisions have been made, but we are staring to plan, trying to figure out where God's plan might lead us next.

Please take a moment to browse through our pictures. Lili is growing up so fast!

Tuesday, April 01, 2008

Strange Days

I had planned on posting a March update, but I will have to do that sometime next week. I have pictures to share, but those too must wait. There are several things going on for us right now and I would love any prayers that people can spare.

  • My grandfather, Clyde Chynoweth, passed away last Sunday following complications from a stroke. Our family is taking it very hard, despite knowing that he has rejoined my grandmother in a better place. He was an incredible man and we are all deeply blessed to have been a part of his life. Please pray for us over the next few days as our family comes together to mourn and to celebrate our patriarch.
  • Around the same time as my grandfather's stroke, my Aunt Lynn was diagnosed with breast cancer. She underwent her first chemo treatment yesterday. Our thoughts and prayers are with her and the rest of the family as well.
  • On a better note, I sent off the creative part of my thesis (which is the bulk of it at 186 pages) to my advisor. All that is left is the introduction and the inevitable revisions. I will try to update my thesis site next week with information on the various challenges I have dealt with getting to this point, for anyone who is interested.
  • Thursday I have an interview for the Human Resources position I had previously mentioned. I come from a family of teachers and boy scouts so I always try to do two things: Be Prepared and Do Your Homework. I am doing both for the interview. I don't know that there is a strong chance I will get the position, but it doesn't hurt to hope. This new job would be a big boost for me both professionally and financially. Fingers crossed.

I suppose that is all for now. I have started writing about some of my favorite memories of my grandfather that I would like to share at later date. Best wishes to everyone.

Amber